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The Poopie List

GHOST POOPIE: The kind where you feel the Poopie come out, but there's no poopie in the toilet.

CLEAN POOPIE: The kind where you poopie it out, see it in the toilet, but there is nothing on the toilet paper.

WET POOPIE: The kind where you wipe your butt fifty times and it still feels unwiped, so you have to put some toilet paper between your butt and your underwear so you don't runie them with a stain.

SECOND WAVE POOPIE: The kind that happens when you're done poopie-ing and you've pulled your pants up to your knees, and you realize you have to poopie some more.

TURTLE POOPIE: The kind of poopie that pops out a little and goes back in a few times before it finallly comes out

POP-A-VEIN-IN-YOUR-FOREHEAD-POOPIE: The kind where you strain so much to get it out, you practically have a stroke.

LINCOLN LOG POOPIE: The kind of Poopie that is so huge you're afraid to flush without first breaking it into little pieces with the plunger.

GAS-SY POOPIE: The kind where it's so noisy, everyone within earshot is giggling!

DRINKER POOPIE: The kind of Poopie you have the morning after a long night of drinking. It's most noticeable trait is the skid marks on the bottom of the toilet.

CORN POOPIE: (Self explanatory)

GEE-I-WISH-I-COULD-POOP POOPIE: The kind where you want to Poopie, but all you do is it on the toilet and fart a few times.

SPINAL TAP POOPIE: That's the kind when it hurts so badly coming out, you swear it was leaving you sideways.

WET CHEEKS POOPIE: (The Power Dump). The kind that comes out of your butt so fast, your butt cheeks get spashed with water.

LIQUID POOPIE: The kind where yellowish-brown liquid shoots you of your butt and spashes all over the toilet bowl.

MEXICAN POOPIE: The kind that smells so bad your nose burns.

UPPER CLASS POOPIE: The kind of Poopie that doesn't smell.

THE SURPRISE POOPIE: You are not even at the toilet, because you are sure you are about to fart, but, OOPS---a Poopie!

THE DANGLING POOPIE: This Poopie refuses to drop into the toilet even though you know you are done poopie-ing. You just pray that a shake or two will cut it loose.

 

Types of Farters

DISHONEST FARTERS

  • They who fart and then blame the dog.

    FOOLISH FARTERS
  • They who keep their farts inside.

    PROMPT FARTERS
  • They who always have a fart ready.

    MISERABLE FARTERS
  • They who cannot fart.

    STRATEGIC FARTERS
  • They who fart and cough at the same time.

    CLEVER FARTERS
  • They who fart and cough at the same time.

    DISAPPOINTED FARTERS
  • Those whose farts do not emit odor.

    ACUTE FARTERS
  • Those whose fart smells indicate their recent diet.

    MEAN FARTERS
  • Those who fart in bed and shake covers over spouse - this is not recommended).

    VAIN FARTERS
  • They who love the smell of their own farts.
    AMIABLE FARTERS
  • They who love the smell of others farts.

    CONFIDENT FARTERS
  • They who let out really loud farts.

    SHY FARTERS
  • Those who let out silent farts.

    SCIENTIFIC FARTERS
  • Those who bottle their own farts.

    UNFORTUNATE FARTERS
  • Those who start to fart but poop instead.

    NERVOUS FARTERS
  • Those who stop in mid fart.

    HONEST FARTERS
  • They who confess to the fart.

    JEALOUS FARTERS
  • They who claim the farts of others.

    INSECURE FARTERS
  • They who compare their fart quality to others.

    THE FARTERS FARTER
  • Those rare farters whose farts clear moving vehicles.
  • Be proud..poopy and fart